Prayer, according to Shaddy

Every few weeks or so, I get a call from a very good friend.  Rashad is one of the Jr. High boys that I hung out with in Reno a couple years ago, and he has taught me many spiritual lessons.  He’s had a very hard life, and lately has been moving around the country with his sister and her sons.  He lost his parents when he was fairly young, and when I met him in Reno he was in 8^th grade, attending the special education program at the local middle school–that was almost three years ago.  He doesn’t have it all together, and sometimes he forgets about simple things like how old he is or what school he goes what grade he’s in, or even the names of people he has met.  But he knows my phone number and wherever he’s at, he’ll give me a call every couple weeks, usually leaving a message in his rough, gravely voice, to the tune of: “hey Austin, this is Rashad.  When you get this message, I’ll call you back”.  It doesn’t always make sense, but Rashad always calls, leaves the same message, and then calls again (usually after I’ve gotten the message telling me that he’ll call me back).

When Shaddy calls, it’s usually awkward.  We haven’t lived in the same state for two years or so, and Rashad’s level of deep and critical thinking doesn’t really lend us with many suitable conversation topics to pull out of thin air.  When that’s coupled with the fact that neither of us have super interesting lives right now (past hanging out with friends, going to school, and trying to follow Jesus), our conversations really aren’t that meaty, deep, or full–or at least not as much as would qualify our conversations as ‘productive’ or ‘great’, in my mind.  But he calls, every 10 days or so, without fail.  We usually have a little 10 minute conversation (always about the same stuff, every day stuff), and then it’s done.  As short and awkward as these calls may be, I value them and look forward to them more than most calls I get.  First, I never know where he’s going to call me from–a pay phone at a gas station, his cousin’s cell phone…one day he called me from a payday loan office he was just passing by!–so that’s always fun and exciting to hear.  Deeper than that, though, I always look forward to getting calls from Rashad for another reason.  Simply put, he likes to talk to me, and I like to talk to him.

So often, I have an agenda.  When I call people, I ether want to discuss something specific, or ask some particular questions or make a request.  When I write letters, I do so because I have something on my mind that I want to address, or something that I want to give somebody.  When I hang out with my friends and loved ones, it’s usually because I want to ‘have a good time’, or to see a certain movie or band, or to go somewhere special.  Rarely ever do I simply hang out with or talk to somebody, just because I enjoy their company.  Just because I like them.

And I need to do more of that.

After my last ‘Shaddy call’, I started thinking about my prayers.  Every time I’ve prayed for at least the last month, I’ve had an agenda.  I can’t remember the last time I’ve spoken with God just to talk with God.  And I think that’s a problem.  You see, over the past couple months, Rashad’s calls have become my favorite part of the week.  And we’ve gotten to the point now where it’s no longer awkward.  Shaddy calls, we chat for a while, and it’s done.  Sometimes, we talk about Jesus, other times we don’t.  Sometimes we talk about important stuff, other times we don’t.  Sometimes we talk about his life and favorite t.v. shows, and sometimes we talk about school.  Sometimes we don’t really have anything to talk about, but that’s great too.  The thing is, what we talk about doesn’t really matter.  All that is important to us is being connected for that 10 minutes or so, once every couple weeks.  We simply enjoy each other’s presence and conversation.

What if I felt the same way about God?  What if I didn’t simply approach God when I wanted something from him or to feel something special or to cope with something?  What if I made an effort to talk to God just because?  About normal, every day things?  I believe that Rashad calls me for two main reasons.  First, he knows that I want to listen, and second, he knows that I care about him.  What if I actually believed that God was the same way?  What would my prayer life–my everyday life–look like?  I’d be a little less selfish, and a little more loving…that’s for sure.  And I’m sure that’s a good thing.

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